We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize