she was so not down for the gang bang
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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