Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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