i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
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I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
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Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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