i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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