and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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