haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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