Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Sober January is a disaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
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