so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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