Whod you bang
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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