He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
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I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
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she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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