Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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