How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize