Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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