there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
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I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
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Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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