dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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