when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
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It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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