marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
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