Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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