oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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