Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize