Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
God, I missed his penis.
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