i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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