i will never coherently bang her
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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