Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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