He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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