Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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