atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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