You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
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I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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