K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize