tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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