I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize