Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
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