peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize