I molested 6 butterflies tonight
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize