You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize