Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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