So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize