Pregnant stripper...not hot.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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