i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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