Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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