Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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