i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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