its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize