How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
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i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
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Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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