Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
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Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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