Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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