We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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