i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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