they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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