You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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