But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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